Among the Ramadan tales told in Majlis (gatherings), there is a story of a man nicknamed al-Asam (Arabic for "deaf") who worried about his wife's hearing, believing it had deteriorated and that she was no longer hearing as she once did. He didn't know how to approach the subject with her, so he consulted a wise hearing specialist. The wise man advised him to test her hearing by standing 10 metres away and ask her in a normal voice about dinner. If she didn't answer, he should move two metres closer, then another two metres, decreasing this distance by two metres each time until he heard a reply.
That evening, the wife was busy in the kitchen preparing food for Iftar (meal for breaking the fast), and the man, standing 10 metres away, began the test. He said to her, "What is our dinner tonight, my love?" The wife remained silent and didn't answer.
The man moved two metres closer and asked again, "What is our dinner tonight, my love?" Silence prevailed, and he received no answer from her. He continued to move closer to the kitchen food preparation platform and asked her again, but still no answer. Then he moved even closer inside the kitchen, but the silence remained. Finally, he stood directly behind her and asked for the fifth time, "What's for Iftar tonight, darling?" His wife replied clearly, "My dear, I'm telling you for the fifth time, we're having soup and Machboos!"
The man finally understood: the problem wasn't with his wife's ears, but with his own! He needed to see a doctor, but he didn't need to test his wife; he needed to test himself. We often hear this saying about one of the teachings of patience in the holy Ramadan: "Sometimes the problem isn't with others, but with us. What we sometimes need is to examine ourselves before blaming others."
