By Barton Goldsmith/MCT
There are people on the planet who have a desire to create very uncomfortable situations for other human beings.
Most unfortunately there is real evil in the world, and not from vampires or zombies. Nope. Evil most often comes from seemingly ordinary people. Sometimes the individuals or groups who are doing evil even think they are doing the right thing, but many others know exactly what they are doing. They enjoy bringing grief to other people’s lives.
Dr M Scott Peck, who is famous for writing The Road Less Travelled, wrote another book titled People of the Lie, which is about the nature of evil in our society and why it exists. If you are battling the evil forces of other human beings, I highly recommend that you read it.
Yes, there are terrible acts of evil that violent criminals commit. But most of the evil that you experience in your everyday life will probably be from people you know and perhaps are (or were) in a relationship with.
The ones we are closest to have the most power to hurt us because we love and trust them and can’t imagine they would turn on us. Yet it happens.
Couples divorce, businesses break up and people steal from their friends and family. When people have anger buried deep inside, and it gets triggered because they’ve been hurt - or, in some cases, merely inconvenienced - that anger can emerge in some very evil ways.
We have all heard the stories of divorcing couples falsely accusing one another of abuse, or worse. This type of evil can ruin lives, which is the perpetrator’s intention.
For evil people, it isn’t enough to leave an uncomfortable situation. They have to hurt the person they believe is the cause, and they feel totally justified.
When people let their dark sides out to inflict hurt, their actions and feelings may have nothing to do with the truth.
Unfortunately, they may find it perfectly acceptable to lie, cheat, or steal if what they’re doing hurts the person they have identified as the one responsible for their current circumstances. They can be very convincing until they are caught in their lie. Unfortunately, some never are.
If you are caught up in this kind of difficulty, you may have the urge to avoid the other person or what’s happening. I urge you instead to stand up for yourself and to fight back, and you don’t have to do it alone. Law enforcement may be helpful, and a good lawyer may be necessary, as well.
You can’t let someone try to ruin your life and then chuckle about it. Getting your old life back may not be possible - and you may not want it - but at the very least, you will have vanquished the responsible party and hopefully won’t have to deal with him or her again.
This gives you a future. Even if you have some rebuilding to do, there is hope, and that is a very powerful force when it comes to reinventing yourself.
- Dr Barton Goldsmith, a psychotherapist in Westlake Village, California, is the author of The Happy Couple: How to Make Happiness a Habit One Little Loving Thing at a Time. Follow his daily insights on Twitter at @BartonGoldsmith, or e-mail him at [email protected]
